Billie Eilish Guesses How 4,669 Fans Responded to a Survey About Her

Bro, a booger just flew out of my nose.

Get me a Kleenex real quick.

[beep] is getting a cold.

[Interviewer] We'll make sure that makes the final cut.

You have to.

[soft upbeat music]

I'm ready to do this.

[Interviewer] Are you nervous at all?

I'm just ready, man, I'm [beep] hype.

[rustling]

Am I answering this?

Am I?

[rustling]

[dinging]

Hey, it's Billie Eilish.

4,669 of you took a survey about me.

This is the official Billie Eilish Fan Survey.

[crashing]

[rustling]

Inside Billie's Mind.

[Interviewer] How many times have you dyed your hair?

Okay, the first time I was nine,

and I dyed this half purple.

Bro, I was nine.

You know how everyone's doing the half-and-half thing?

I was nine and this half of my head was purple, fire.

Since I was 13, I've been dying my hair,

getting it re-dyed every two months, every month,

probably over 30 times.

It may look like it's all falling out,

[laughing]

'cause it is, but I feel like a lot of them would say blue,

'cause I know they liked the blue.

I think a lot of them are gonna troll me

and probably say that I shouldn't dye my hair again

'cause it's all gonna fall out,

'cause it is already and they know that.

So I think between blue or maybe the silver again.

They liked that one.

I liked that one, too.

[Interviewer] Ready for the results?

I'm ready for the results.

[printer whirring]

What?

Purple, lavender is the top result.

That's 819 people voted that.

Pink, 624 people voted that.

What the hell?

Blue, 470, that's not bad.

That's a lot of people, still.

Whatever she wants,

[laughing]

89 people said that.

That's cute, I like that one.

Damn, purple?

[rustling]

What question do you think Billie

is most tired of being asked?

That question. [laughs]

[Interviewer] Do people ask it a lot?

Yeah, but if I'm being real, maybe about homeschooling.

I make music with my brother Finneas

and we used to get questions that were like,

Where did you guys meet?

[laughs]

My brother, oh my god.

Never ask me that again, oh my god.

What are the fans tired of me being asked?

I don't even know.

Honestly don't know.

[printer whirring]

What was it like being homeschooled?

Ahh, ooh.

425 people said that.

Why do you wear baggy clothes?

That's a good one.

How did you get famous so fast?

177, see, to everyone else it was fast,

but it was not fast to me.

What do you get at Taco Bell?

Eight people said that, eight.

I saw a tweet of a fan that was like,

What the [beep] does Billie get at Taco Bell?

Taco Bell's one place that I don't go for gluten-free.

It's just not worth it to me.

Go crazy with the wheat.

I'll be farting all day.

Some Taco Bell, whoo!

Leave the room.

[laughs]

[rustling]

Which photo of herself do you think Billie likes the most?

It's funny because, I don't know.

My life is really weird now that if I wanna show a picture

of me wearing a specific outfit to a friend of mine or like,

I wore this one time, let me show you a picture,

and I don't have a picture on my phone,

I can literally look up, Billie Eilish in big yellow coat,

and find a picture of me wearing

the coat I'm trying to show.

That's weird, that's weird.

Yeah, I love seeing pictures of myself,

[laughs]

but I always have though, like it's not new.

[laughs]

Okay. [rustling]

I feel like I know what the first one is.

Come on, eww, my Invisalign is bold in this.

I like this one, I do like this one,

I'm put that one over here.

Hate this, more than I've ever hated anything.

Why do you guys have this picture?

This one, no one's gonna ever see.

This one's hard.

This one's hard, but there's something going on

that I don't like, I don't know what it is but I don't know.

This is just awful, so, that one.

[Interviewer] Take a look at the one

you think they picked.

Option three, 52.5%.

Oh this is close.

This is very close.

That's good, see they know me.

It's either, yeah, it would never be those two.

Hell no, these two are hard.

These two are hard as hell.

These, you don't gotta worry about them.

[laughing]

Bye.

[rustling]

Boobs!

My boobs.

That's the truth.

My boobs, maybe my, I don't know, that's it.

[printer whirring]

That's my favorite part about myself, okay.

Her style, number one.

788 people have said that.

Her voice.

[Interviewer] You're not confident about your voice?

Not confident about my voice, no way.

[Interviewer] Really?

I love singing, and I love performing,

and I've always loved singing since I was like, one,

but I'm not confident about it.

I'm getting there.

Her lips, 344.

Her eyes, 279.

Her hair, 132, so wrong.

Very not confident about my hair

because of what has happened to it.

Her earlobes.

[laughing]

One person said that.

That's actually pretty good.

My style?

Pretty confident.

I would say that works as the winner.

[rustling]

[printer whirring]

Music break.

[Interviewer] So we actually have a video of a person

asking you the question.

Ooo, cute!

Hi Billie. What music video are you most proud of?

Look at her with the little poster of me in the back.

Very cute.

What video am I most proud of?

When The Party's Over.

It came out exactly the way I wanted it to come out.

I had a vision in my head.

We worked really hard on it.

We did a bunch of takes, and then we got it,

and it was one take, and it was brutal.

I feel like they'll probably say When the Party's Over.

They might say Bad Guy because I edited Bad Guy myself.

I feel like if I was them and I saw that I edited that one

they would probably be like

Oh she's probably most proud of that

'cause she did it herself,

but, it's not that one.

[printer whirring]

[mumbling]

See.

All the Good Girls Go to Hell, 1,264.

Yeah, Bury a Friend, and When the Party's Over!

Was I right or was I right?

[paper ripping]

It used to be this line from I Don't Wanna Be You Anymore

which is what they're gonna say, which is,

If I love you as a promise,

would you break it if you're honest,

tell the mirror what you know she's heard before,

I don't wanna be you anymore,

'Cause I used to say that was my favorite.

Still is like one of my favorites, but,

I don't know, now it would probably be

this song that isn't out, yet.

[printer whirring]

[rustling]

Yep!

I don't wanna be you anymore.

That's the only line.

[laughing]

323.

You didn't mean to, aww.

You didn't mean to say I love you.

I love you and I don't want to.

That's so, I like that one too, 225.

If I love you was a promise,

would you break it, if you're honest,

there you go.

See, but that and that are the same,

so they should really be together.

199 people said that.

If teardrops could be bottled,

there'd be swimming pools filled my models,

157.

The world's a little blurry,

or maybe it's my eyes.

Ohh, I like all those.

I feel like the fans think the same way I do.

I like those answers.

[Interviewer] There are so many different answers.

Yes, [bleep] yeah!

Really?

[Interviewer] Yeah.

That's dope.

That's a very good sign.

That's so cute.

Sick.

[paper rustling]

Oop.

[upbeat music]

Mmm, Donald Glover.

He's been the biggest inspiration for me since I was 10.

Him and, like, Rihanna and Tyler and Kanye,

all people that take what they got and turn it into more

instead of just sticking to the thing they got known for.

Donald Glover would probably be the top one,

but the rest that I mentioned also.

I think that the fans will probably say Tyler.

[folder sliding]

Hoo hoo.

Told you.

856.

[gasps]

My baby, just kidding.

530, Hailey is literally an angel from heaven,

but come on, look at that face, 530.

Ooh, hell yeah, 452.

Sick.

Oh.

This my brother.

384, pretty good.

The Beatles, hell yeah, 47.

Wow, they didn't put Childish Gambino.

Finneas surprises me a lot.

[Interviewer] Why's that?

Well, 'cause the question is whose career do I admire.

Yeah, careers are like the same career.

We do, you know.

I admire him as a human, so that maybe for sure.

The way that he loves people, I admire a lot.

Finneas is a romantic to the [bleep] moon

and I am not that, so I try to be more like him sometimes,

but see, I told you they'd say Tyler.

Avril, hell yeah.

She's just a [bleep] punk girl.

Bieber has gone through more than you can possibly imagine.

I can't believe what he's gone through

and what's he survived through even.

He's a very impressive human.

I like this one, I like this one, all of them.

Respect.

[rustling]

So I've probably cried twice in the last month,

which is kinda crazy, because last year,

the year before that, or even the beginning of this year

it would have been like every day for a month.

I'll think they'll say more because

if this was a year ago, it would been like,

100 times in the last month.

They're gonna say a lot of tears.

Okay, every day, 5.6%.

20-25 times, damn, in the last month?

10-19 times 23.9%, six to 10 times, 17%.

Three to five, 32%, one to two 11%, zero, 3%.

[chuckles]

The 11% got it right, one to two times.

I teared up like a billion times,

but that's 'cause I'm soft.

No, I'm not.

[paper crumpling]

Transmutations.

[rustling]

If Billie were any plant, animal, or food,

what would she be and why?

They would obviously say I'd be a burrito,

because you are what you eat.

People say I look like a llama.

That face looks like a llama, tell me it doesn't.

If I go, tell me that doesn't look just like a llama.

When they eat, tell me, you know what I mean?

A plant, [bleep] I don't know plants.

The [bleep] kind of plant would I be?

A succulent, I don't know.

[laughs]

It's the only plant name I can think of.

[folder sliding]

See?

[chuckles]

That looks scrumptious, does it not?

Damn, 1,570 people said a burrito, and we got some chips.

Oh, a spider.

Okay, hell yeah, that's a good picture.

318 people said a spider.

That [bleep] hard.

A horse, yeah I thought they might say a horse.

So pretty, 272 people said a horse.

Such a pretty horse.

242 people said I'd be an avocado.

That bit, that [bleep] is bitter old.

For like three years, that [bleep] been old.

A cactus, a cactus really?

The [bleep]?

[Interviewer] What's wrong with a cactus?

That [bleep] sharp.

[bleep] is prickly.

I'm not prickly.

[bleep] shaves.

I shave.

[laughing]

Not prickly.

An octopus.

She might actually be an octopus.

One person said that.

You couldn't find a picture of an octopus?

Like, what the hell?

I should have known they'd pick avocado, for [bleep] sake.

I forget that that's a food.

That [bleep] should not be a food.

Look at this.

That's a food, you know what I mean?

Like, that [bleep] looks like a [bleep] alien.

Tastes good, though.

Horses, yeah, for sure.

Of course they'd say that.

Thank you.

If Billie could switch lives with anyone,

dead or alive, who would it be?

Somebody with, like, a really good voice.

Ariana Grande's voice is [bleep] crazy.

I can, can you imagine opening your mouth

and that comes out?

Holy [bleep].

I love Frank Sinatra, his voice too,

to be able to, oh my god.

Also just him, I think he's so.

I feel like they're gonna say,

I would say A$AP Rocky because I did once.

Somebody said, who would you switch lives with for one day

and I said A$AP because I would just

stand naked in the mirror

[laughs]

and just look.

I'd just look.

I would just, you know what I mean?

Just go like, and I was him then it wouldn't be creepy,

know what I mean,

[printer whirring]

'cause can you believe A$AP Rocky

gets to look at himself in the mirror every day?

That's fire.

Ohh, [bleep], I should have said that too, damn.

Sabrina Claudio, 511 people said that.

Tyler, the Creator, 434 people said that.

Bieber, 430.

Avril Lavigne, 247.

Frank Sinatra, 189.

Dwighht Schrute, with two H's.

Wow, you guys put two H's in there, 37.

[Interviewer] Sometimes we can't spell.

[laughs]

That's okay, me too.

Why would I want to be Dwight Schrute?

That's a tortured soul.

You know what goes on in that dude's head?

His character is so funny, but it's because

he's so annoying that it's funny.

You know how exhausting it is to be annoying?

I was looking at home movies of me at 11.

I was just always saying the wrong thing

and like, just weird and awkward and didn't fit my clothes,

and that was the Brandy Melville phase.

Yeah, Frank Sinatra, that's a good one.

They did say that one.

They didn't say A$AP, so I guess they didn't see

that interview where I said that.

Sabrina Claudio though, I would pick her

for the same reasons I'd pick A$AP Rocky.

[printer whirring]

In the Clouds.

What is my favorite sound?

I thought about this, 'cause I saw this question.

That's a good question.

I would say that my favorite sound is bass.

The feeling you get here when there's like

a crazy amount of bass at a concert

or at even a sound check or whatever,

'cause I used to go to concerts

all the time when I was younger,

and I'd stand right at the front,

and you know, if you're at the front

you're right in front of the speakers,

right in the front of this [bleep] woofer.

You get hit with the bass for real

and I just loved it, oh my god, it just.

I make music with so much bass in it,

and like, 'cause I love it so much

and I love going to concerts with it, and so bass.

Oh my god.

[paper sliding]

[mimics farting]

You know what's actually really funny about this [bleep]

is that when we were going over the questions,

I was in this room.

Laura, she's right over there, and I said,

what do you think my favorite sound is,

and she said, farts, and then my mom walked in

and I was like, mom, what do you think my favorite sound is,

and she was like, it'd probably be a fart.

They did not hear what each other had said,

and then Danny, my manager walked in,

and I said, Danny, what do you think

my favorite sound would be, and he went.

[raspberry]

[laughs]

That's so sad.

So, fart is in very bold letters.

Fart!

That's what I say, fart, and then silence.

It's a line from Crown, I get that.

Piano, there's ukelele, music, chains, acrylic nails,

[nails tapping]

you know what I'm saying?

Her car, ooh, that's a good one.

Shorty's outside right now waiting for me with the dragon.

Bass, there you go, rain, rap, burp, wind, Ilomilo.

Sabrina Claudio is my favorite sound.

A dentist's drill, yikes, but fart is the biggest one.

If aliens abducted Billie, they would say,

Man, humans are really, blank.

What the hell would they say?

Oh, man, humans are really pale.

They saw me as their first human, they'd be like damn!

Damn, you know what I mean?

[snorts]

Oh, that's so cute.

[squeaks]

Man, humans are really beautiful.

Very sweet.

Weird, pretty, hot, cool, talented, dumb, annoying.

Wow, I love this.

Wack, funny, sad.

Okay,

[giggles]

and then there's a lot of little ones I don't need to read.

Oh, sexy.

[printer whirring]

What does Billie mean to you?

[Interviewer] What do the fans mean to you?

That's like asking how much you love your mom.

They're like everything.

[Interviewer] Would you like to see

what some of the fans wrote about you?

I would love to.

The fans are like my best friends.

I don't know how to put that love into a sentence.

She means the world, the literal world.

She is my fashion inspiration and everything I aim to be.

Everything you aim to be?

Crazy.

Poop.

Billie is an idol to me and to the whole 2000s generation.

That's very cute.

These are cute.

Oh, this one's long.

Okay, it's like when you go on a roller coaster

and you're going up waiting for the drop,

then your stomach drops and then you get off the ride

and you want to do it again.

She's like the drop.

She makes you feel a different way

and her music makes you want to do it again.

You always remember that feeling of being on the ride.

She means the world to me,

and I hope one day I'll get to meet her.

See, a [bleep] is about to cry now.

A lot.

As an artist myself, I draw.

Oh, she draws, he draws, whoever, they draw.

She is such an inspiration.

A young artist, her music, and all she does.

Too cute.

Oh, some art.

I'm assuming that's her, right?

Sick, this is fire.

Yes, girl, boy, whoever.

Dude, like a lot.

Hee hee hee, I love them.

Thank you guys for watching.

I'm Billie Eilish, I love you to my core,

I can't even tell you how much I love you.

I love you so much, I love you so much, and,

[cannon pops]

Sheesh, it's a [bleep]

[paper flittering]

[laughs]

Yay!

[clapping]